Things I Randomly Just Suck at...

Lets face it. I'm not perfect. In fact...far from it. Maybe further from it then most people. I keep discovering things that I am far below average at and it makes me laugh/smile/awkwardly sad to think about some of them. They are all small and pretty insignificant and in many cases hilarious. Obviously, there are other things, but for this entry, we are going to stick with these. Otherwise I could go on for days. Literally.The first thing I suck at:

1. Grocery Shopping

This should be easy. I'm a single guy who doesn't really cook, to be honest, almost ever. To make things seemingly even easier on me, I used to work at Cub Foods...for almost three years. However, the problems begin immediately. First of all, I hate going, so that almost makes me in a pissy mood. Second, I ALWAYS fail at getting a cart or even a basket...I just walk in. I have to go back to get one later in the trip when I realize I can't just carry all this around the store. Second, I wander around like a lost child at Disney World who is looking for the Tea Cups ride. I never make a list (Be Prepared? I wasn't a boy scout, obviously) so I gallivant around trying to remember what I want. I end up looking at things like soup for a long time and then deciding not to get any. By the time I get to checking out, an hour or two could have passed and I have 60 dollars worth of groceries. At least I don't suck at checking out. After I get home (likely dropping a bag or something) I always remember something that I forgot to get. Shopping should not be this much of an ordeal!

2. Spilling

This has become such an urban legend that I hesitate to put it on this list. Yes, I spill often. No, I don't spill at EVERY meal. However, it is often in the most ridiculous way that I spill. Anyone can accidentally tip over a glass. Not everyone can spill a drink because they brought it up to their mouth to take a drink...even though they have a straw and manage to spill all of it all over themselves. That takes talent!

3. Using glue and scissors

This one is just silly. My Mom can tell you stories about how when I was really young how I struggled with cutting and pasting. I would cut zig-zags all over the place to insane levels. I'd always use to little or too much glue. It apparently even worried my pre-school teacher...like my ability to cut and paste would affect my development or something. Sadly, I went throughout the rest of school being below average. I even did a terrific art project once and ruined it be cutting badly. Luckily, these skills are rarely used anymore, with everything becoming so paperless. I couldn't be happier.

4. Making my bed

I never seem to do it right and always ends up looking like crap. It's okay though. I gave up making my bed years ago, but on the rare occasion I do it, it looks like a crazed man came in and tried to make his bed look like a Sears catalog ad. Back in the college days there was nothing I hated more then just trying to put the sheets on my lofted bed. It was horrible and to this day I still have no idea how I ever accomplished putting sheets on my bed.

5. Writing interesting blog posts

Okay. That was supposed to be a joke, but I was bored today. Maybe one of the other things I suck at is "being productive at work", but I think that is okay.

={+}=